All I went through and it's all for naught. My soul is ruined, blackened by the blood of innocents. I've killed...and killed...
Oh God...
And she wouldn't even kill me. But, then, I don't deserve death. I deserve to suffer endlessly, never to be forgiven.
She says something was controlling me. Doesn't matter. I should have been stronger, better. I should have denied it, fought it, not allowed it to use me.
The memories, they're coming back slowly but surely. It was the song, that bloody song. That evil thing used it to turn a switch in my head.
To turn me into a killer again.
When I bit, when I drank, I felt no pain, only euphoria.
Red's right. I have a taste for it now.
Human blood.
The chip's still working, but my madness seems to be able to push me past it. When the craving becomes too much, will I lash out and bite again? Feed again?
From any of them?
I say I won't. I say I'll be strong, but I'm not. I'm so weak and broken. A shell, filled only with a ruined and screaming soul.
I can't see anyway back from this. I can never be the help she needs, the comfort she craves, the man I so wanted to be.
What I've become, is not what she deserves.
My journey was all for naught.
End